Although I didn’t know it, my whole life has been immersed into the queer community. My mom gave birth to me at 18 years old and married my dad when I was a year old. Growing up I had many LGBTQIA+ aunts, uncles, cousins, and even just family friends. My mom has been going to Pride since before I was born. The term “Queer” in today’s society is defined as “something that goes against societal norms”. Donald E. Hall in his book, “Queer Theories” states, “…queer identity need not be grounded in any positive truth or stable reality…Queer is by definition whatever is at odds with the normal, the legitimate, the dominant,” (pg 67). This would seem to be the perfect term to use in the LGBTQIA+ community, this that is exactly what they are doing. The fact that they are so bravely going into the world and saying “Hey I’m not exactly like you, and that’s okay” is empowering. However, the more I thought about it, the more I’m not sure it should be/can be embraced by people outside of the LGBTQIA+ community.
There are many beneficial things the term “Queer” brings to the table. Overall it’s an umbrella term for the LGBTQIA+ community. This is good for people, especially the youth, who aren’t sure who they are yet, but know they are different. They know they have a safe space to go to and a group of people who will accept them, when they may not feel so accepted by others. It’s also gender inclusive, which is very important in the LGBTQIA+ community. People in this community who identify as “non binary” or “genderqueer” have a word that they can use to describe themselves and feel like they are part of a group they can relate to. U.S. National Institutes of Health's National Library of Medicine says that LGBTQIA+ youth are starting to come out at younger ages, and yet they’re still at alarmingly high rates for “compromising mental health”. If they can feel accepted in a community, like the queer community, this can possibly help this group of youth not be more susceptible to mental health issues. The term queer isn’t just gender inclusive, but also inclusive to all sexualities. Because of the definition, queer isn’t just LGBTQIA+, it just means people who break the norms. This gives allies a term that makes them feel part of the community, without feeling outcasted for not being LGBTQIA+.
While there are many great reasons the LGBTQIA+ community should embrace the word “queer”, there are also some things that make me hesitant. The first thing is the definition. We define queer as going against the norms of society. But everyone has different norms. My norm was growing up with two moms. While the definition is “societal norms”, people who grew up with different norms can feel outcasted because they’re not actively going against the norms. Something else is that the queer community has a long complex history that’s hard to pinpoint. While we need this telling of history to show that LGBTQIA+ have been around since before we remember, like Hall says, “There would be no popular and effective lesbian and gay rights movement today without a process of historical data recovery, which opens up the possibility of affirming contemporary lives by looking back over time to find that we are not alone in our experiences of oppression and struggles for acceptance,” (Hall 22). However, as a classmate explained, because history is usually told in the eyes of the majority, the LGBTQIA+ history may be warped. Another thing that makes me hesitant is the question of if the term “queer” is too generic. People take their identity seriously and there’s the possibility that the term queer doesn’t capture all of someones identity, like race or ethnicity. Also “queer” has this connotation of being affiliated with the LGBTQIA+ community. This means that people of another community, but are still technically queering, may be turned away from using the term because they aren’t LGBTQIA+.
As a cisgendered straight woman, the term queer has always been a confusing one for me. My family is very LGBTQIA+ oriented with my moms, that are married to each other, and my family that is part of the community, I feel that I can’t be. My family is queer because let’s face it, not everyone has two moms or expects two moms in a family, but my sexuality and gender is very normal in the eyes of society. This makes me feel like I shouldn’t be able to use that term as describing myself. Another thing that I think of when I think of “queering something”, using queer as a verb, is how can I queer my own life? My own personal normal is something that someone would consider queer. So what do I do in my life so that I feel like I am also queering my life. In my own opinion I don’t know what we would switch out “queer” with if we had to. I do think queer is beneficial to the LGBTQIA+ community, however I think embracing it more than the community already is, would start having a negative impact on the rest of the ally community and others who should use it. I believe that the rest of society should start embracing and using the word “queer” in everyday usage.
I found your post very interesting. Your point on the term being too generic is especially fascinating to me. I do see my friends using the word to describe who they are, and I still support them through their journey, yet I think that because sexuality and gender have become broadened, those people might as well be the most comfortable in using the word "queer" because they are not identifying as one specific label. "Queer" can probably being a start point in their journey of how to really identify themselves as well. As a straight and cisgender woman too, I cannot speak for someone's experience, yet I can share what my LGBTQIA+ friends have talked to me about. My question for you is that while the term has evolved to become more positive, can it be harder for people to use in the end because of how broad it is?
ReplyDeleteThank you, Aspen, for your post. I really appreciate the complexity with which you approach this term and how it might not be the best fit everyone who is connected to LGBTQIA+ issues and community. As you rightfully note, even though someone like you who's grown up as you have, could fit within this queer umbrella, if it means not normal, what is someone to do who feels as if their experience has been normal (but might not be viewed as such by others)? It's an important tension to raise and explore, and I'm glad you've given voice to it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, please see my additional comments/feedback in WorldClass for more of my evaluation of your work.
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